ZOMBIE FORUMS

Why? because of this funny but depresing list of warning labels do we really need these? are we that dumb?

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

*slaps forehead then twats it on desk repitedly*

It's because people have already done that stuff and lawsuits ensued.
And n00b's arnt suposed to make threads or post stupid crap.
So if there arn't any objections can I initiate this wea little bastard?

Coming from a guy who posted the day after he joined fucking hypocrite. http://forums.kyhm.com/viewtopic.php?topic=1303&forum=4&19
Oh and think before you call somebody a "wea little bastard"
A.Fiver says I'm bigger then you!
B.I'm an inteligent wea little bastard

_________________
of course it's not a snake look when I kick it like so.....

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: The End 007 on 2002-10-30 16:25 ]</font>

I leave this matter in the hands of the great elders....

...clever

Points for the scrounging for data like that, but that list just depresses me even more...

I had already been taken into the fold. You should study your opponent more carefully. Soon your arse shall be fodder.

hehe i thought it was funny

Very clever. I think we might have a quality n00b here folks! Hell he might have even been lurking for that long instead of scrounging (prolly not but it was a thought)...

And I agree with Ruiku. That was damn clever. Especially for a Brit. (a guess but I think an accurate one, might be an Australian though)

-Lifyre
I would like to note the Kaiser is offically a greater post whore than myself or Kit. At 16+ posts a day he takes the cake!

_________________
"After A Night Of Too Much Alcohol And Spirits,
Thou Must Kneel, Embrace Thy Throne.
And Sacrifice To The Porcelain God."
-John 3:16AM


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Lifyre on 2002-10-30 16:43 ]</font>

hmmm... the things are funny, and it's not just a 'hey I'm new thread' but I've all heard them before at different sources. i did like your comments however. I think a mild initiation is in order.

*takes the End to a chair*

"If you would please sit down. yes I fear the tying down to the chair is obligatory. you can keep one hand free though" *attaches a headphone to The End's head.*

"Now this cassette is called 'best of the IRC channel, political edition' containing such classics as 'Rand and Icy disccuss the virtues of anarchism VS communism', 'Rand and Icy indoctrinate Madadric', 'Icy and KC discuss anarchy' 'Rand and KC discuss communism' and of course 'KC on Iraq, volume I, II and III' Now i'll juts push play. For those who wonder whether this is mild, you're right. Now comes the mild part"

*Rand puts a Smith And weston near The End.*

"There is one bullet in it, if shot in the mouth it will cause death.I shall leave you now"

*Rand goes outside and starts counting*

"203, 204, 205"

*BANG*

"hm... lasted longer then I imagined."

*Rand walks in, removes the rope and headphone and The End is ressurected."

"here, have a beer, welcome in the forums. Visit the IRC channel, read my Chick tract MST, ask for my Jailbait threesome lemon, read the..."

*Rand is smacked on the head by another poster*

"Never mind...welcome. perhaps you could put 'initiated by Rand Al'Tor' in your sig till you're out of newbieness"

edit: feh... I know he's a smart newbie. But the idea popped in and I just had to. And believe me The ENd *smiles evilly* this IS a mild initiation by my standards. Just ask H-cat

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Rand Al'Tor on 2002-10-30 16:43 ]</font>

Heh,I thought it was funny too.You just forgot about toothpick boxes.

And pulling up Kaiser's history was a nice move as well.

That being said, I say it's all clear, as this one DID prove intelligence by knowing that a thread was posted the day after a n00b signed up.

We have thousands of threads. To find ONE, taking into account that sure, you only look for that one poster as the topic started...

Yeah. Wise. I like. *nods*

-BiShouNenKaMi
Sits well with me.

Oh thank god it's over *gradually eding away from Rand Al'Tor*

And Lifyre what's wrong with being british? That was just below the belt so what if I'm British, so what if I'm from a country that isn't America?

And all is complete. welcome.
...and beware, the IRC tapes...just a small sample of a larger evil...

Height, weight, and grade level.
Just curious.

There is nothing wrong with being a brit! Well ok there are some things wrong with being a brit... but their good things. Have you Met Ollie? or Rand? Their both brits. WE like brits. They make good pets

-Lifyre
You wanted below the belt and thats as far as I go with people I like...

I said it once I will say it again.

Isn't that canada's job?

6ft4 11 stone and grade level? I'm in college if thats what you mean.
Edit: BTW I'm 16 so I still have time to get bigger too.

Lifyre I noticed Ollie was a Brit didn't know Rand was though.


_________________
of course it's not a snake look when I kick it like so.....

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: The End 007 on 2002-10-30 16:52 ]</font>

Brit? me? nah, I'm a Belgian. Do I sound Brittish then? *hides his monocle*

And what is this edging away? You probably don't even have a trauma. H-cat still screams a little whenever he sees Yuffie or Selphie.

Its the rope when I first saw it I thought you wanted to play scary games, and er well um I'd rather not go there evil deeds to commit, and you could've at least given me something interesting to kll myself with semtex and a detonator would have been nice, even a thermal nuclear device. Why just a plan old gun?