*The curtain opens on The Initiation Theatre, Chaos stands centre stage with the crystalized Ace right beside him.*
“Thank you, Thank you all for coming. As you know I am a self-styled Chaosmancer. Now that usually means I make things happen. Most of the time I use subtle means to bring my will to bear. Other times though, I can be as subtle as a bat to the face... Speaking of which.”
*Chaos walk over and picked up a bigass bat, and walks over to the still crystalize Ace. Chaos rears the hammer back, holding just for a second, for suspense, and bashed Ace’s clear prison into tiny shards of glass. Ace, not prepared for his sudden release, falls down into the sharp fragments of his former prison.*
“Get up Ace, I need you in relatively healthy condition in order to pull this off. You might note that your powers have been suspended for a while. Just to let you know, nothing personal. But I have been spending some time calling some... friends of mine. Arranging for your little adventure tonight. I also had some fun raiding the locker rooms in this theatre. Hope you all don’t mind, but I am borrowing some old props. Actually. I just took this potion from Rands locker. It’s all for the cause comrade. I will help you in the future as a friend should. But first. The mind wipe. I will weaken this boys mind. As I have been stuck in Rehearsals for the Mikado, I know how these songs can get stuck in you head. So, in you go Ace.”
*Chaos then trows Ace into a tiny little cubical and locks the door to it.*
“Now, this will play the same Broadway songs over and over. This is maximised to irritate the mind the most. I call it... well... The Music Box... that doesn’t work... wait. I remember the rule. It’s called The Music Box OF DOOM!!! He will be provided basic food and water, and constant ‘get stuck in your head’ music. This will take a few days, so I asked a favour from Yevaud. Gotta love having a Local Chronomancer.”
*From the back of the theatre, a large golden dragon casts a spell. All watch as a little clock on the top of the cubical spins a high speed, stopping after four days has passed on the inside.”
“Now let’s see how he is doing.”
*The door opens to show the unfortunate n00b curled up in a fetal position, crying “Get them out” over and over again.”
Chaos speaks to the n00p gently “Hey, Ace?”
“Why?”
“Ace, you have a choice right now. I can put you back in that room or...”
“NO!!!”
“OR... I have something else you can do. I might even rub that song out of your head. I know that you can take only so much of G&S and The Mikado, The Pinafore, The Pirates of...”
“Don’t say that name, I’ll do anything!!!”
“Ok. I got your permission. LET’S HAVE FUN!!!”
*Random cheers from the audience.*
“Ok, Ace. Look into my eyes. Deep into my eyes. Look into them”
*Ace notes the novelty of looking into Chaos’ glowing blues, and can even see some fractal patterns in the light, but the novelty quickly wears off.*
“Are you trying to hypnotise me, or something? ‘Cause it’s not working.”
“No, I’m just distracting you while I get the chloroform ready.”
“What chloro...”
*Ace then faints after having a rag shoved into his face*
***
Ace wakes up in a darkened room. He is sitting in the middle of a pool of light.
“Hello?”
A voice echos from the darkness.
“Welcome. This is phase two of your initiation. There will be four in total. Now in this phase, you shall be eaten by hungry animals. It will hurt like a bitch. You might not survive. Enjoy.”
Around then Ace notices a chittering sound coming from all directions. Shadows moving, and getting closer. Ace stands in the centre of the light, hoping it will shield him from the unseen menace, but to no avail. One of the small shapes enters the light to reveal... a chipmunk. Ace laughs out loud.
“A Chipmunk. Your going to have me get eaten by a bunch Rescue Ranger Rejects?”
Chaos eyes appear in the shadows. “No. They were to scare you shitless. I’m handing you over to the forum dragons.”
Just then a trap door opens under Ace’s feet, throwing him into a pit. After he regains his senses he notices three hulking forms above him. His screams are drowned out by the roar of dragons, his attempts to run thwarted by Icy Breath of a Giant Blue. And he was torn apart by the three. Only to wake up screaming in a limousine with Chaos sitting beside him. (Ace then noted that damned music is STILL in his head.)
“Relax, Ace. It was a dream. It never happened. You will meet those three in the future though. So I suggest you play nice. Were here. I need you to drink this.”
*Chaos hands him a vial and Ace foolishly drinks it without question. Ace is then surprised to learn that he has lost his penis and sprouted a pair of Double Ds. He did get to long to explore his newfound body parts however, as the limo pulls up to a building. Chaos walks to the door and has a package handed to him. He then walks back to the car.*
“Ok Ace. Part three. Come on inside.”
*They both enter the building, and see that there are three men inside, all rather bulky and all looking mean.*
“Ace, These are my... friends. Bubba, Joe, and Steamer. They just got out of jail. They know all about what’s happening to you and all would love to ‘play’. Oh, don’t worry. The potion only last for two hours.” Chaos walks to the door and begins to count his newly gained money. “Oh, I signed you up for three hours with the boys. Enjoy.”
*** Three hours later ***
A body is thrown bloodied and violated on the streets next to Chaos. Chaos leans over to Ace.
“Just to let you know. Nothing personal Ace. Your jumping around and your reviving dead threads with a post where you jump in and out made you a good target for this idea I had. Just so you know. Yes, I was a n00b once. And I was Initiated. The one who Initiated me was Initiated by one greater. This is tradition. This is our welcome. Trial by fire, if you will. Now comes stage four.”
Ace moans, fearing what Chaos will bring on next, but is surprised by Chaos’ next words.
“The clean-up. Here’s a healing potion I picked up. Should get you feeling better. And here’s a song I like to get G&S outta your head. And I’ll buy you a drink of your choice. Put Initiated by Chaos_Descending into your sig and you’ll hopefully not have to go through this again. So... let’s go back to
BB&G’s and get a drink.”
*With that the Chaos and Ace go to get drunk.*
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that is so hilarious !
