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 Post subject: An essay on the cultural undercurrents inherent in the creation of the Stoat forum.
PostPosted: Wed Jun 22, 2005 11:30 pm 
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/Cue pictures of Stoatopia as it is today, soft old trumpet melodies playing in the background.

/Show Title:
The cultural undercurrents inherent in the creation of the Stoat forum.


Image
/Cut into interview with Evil-Actor, sitting in front of a frame of him dressed up in his Stoat Tse-Tung outfit.
Evil-Actor: It was a different time back then. Something you people might not realise nowadays with your electronic do-dads, but just months ago Stoatopia didn't exist at all. In fact the land its built on was mostly deserted after months of inactivity. It was our right to try and build it up, and it was our shame that it fell so very far so very fast.


/Cue pictures of Stoatopia before the first post was erected.

Narrator: It was boredom predominately that led to the creation of the Stoat forum. Boredom and fear of moving the midlands forum too far from the middle of the comic forums display. While not a serious issue to many, others were not so ambivalent.
For so very long had the midlands been central to forum real-estate and with the withdrawal of the Nairohe controlled forum known today as "Dysfunctional" by then administrator Kyhm at her request the Midlands was moved up. Away from the centre which its name had lead many to believe was its birthright.


/Cue old music and black and white photo montage of soldiers and cannons.

Narrator: In a private message to the Administrators from that era Midlands creator and administrator RMG admonished the lack of centrality for his territory.


/Cue picture of the letter.

Image
RMG(Voice actor reading): In this time and place I find it inconceivable that such a blatant disregard for our rights at Midlandians could be ignored. Least war break out amongst our kin I would suggest a new locality to replace that which was lost, guaranteeing Midlandian centrality into the far future.
Please communicate back at a convenient time for you to discuss this solution.
Yours truly, Rincewinds Mog Ghost.

Narrator: However this letter, if it was received was never responded to during that year.
It was in this time that a young officer in the Midlands forces began to rise up through the ranks. Known as Tamayo this dynamic leader lead the Midlands forces using nothing more than her inspiring personality and drive. Interviewed before vanishing many hours ago Tamayo remained bitter about the conflict to the very end.


/Cue Tamayo interview from several days ago, sitting in an outfit that is just old fashioned enough to show how old this interview is. Film quality is grainy.

Image
Tamayo: It was a cold day in hell before we'd give up our central position. Those f**$ing simple minded fools in Administration at the time thought we were kidding around.
Interviewer(off screen): You don't regret the horrors that followed?
Tamayo: Until the day I die I'll know I did the right thing in fighting for my people and what they believed in.
Interviewer(off screen): And the ferrets that suffered?
Tamayo: (Silence for a few seconds).... that, that wasn't us. It wasn't what we all stood for in those days, those camps they just, everything got so big that no one really, it was a different time and I.... (more silence). Can we turn of the cameras please, this interview is over. (more silence) Just turn it off.
/Screen goes blank.


/Cue photos of the town meetings and Starbucks coffee houses.

Image
Narrator: In letters from the time it can be seen that revolutio was brewing coffee on a daily basis, and that along with that revolution was brewing amongst the forumers.


/Cue photos of Midlander owned shops burnt to the ground by protesters.

Image
Ancient(Voice actor reading): My love It may be some time before I write to you again, love is around us but hatred is growing. I saw two boys today jumping up and down on what was a picnic some Midlandians had set up, the family had been arrested in front of my eyes by the militia led by Evil-Actor. They don't love very well. Its getting harder to have faith in these dark uncertain times. Much love.


/Cut into interview with Evil-Actor, sitting in front of a frame of him at one of the No-Central for Midlands rallies.

Image
Evil-Actor: There was open hostility in the streets, I've never seen anything like it. This Midlandian offered to shine my shoes and his friend stole my hat. (Laughs) I yelled out "Keep the hat bitch! Your still a Lander!" Lander is what we called them in those times, centies was another one. We were pretty pissed at them folk in particular because until then we'd have no troubles in the Forums. But this whole thing just boiled over like an oven.
Yes I lead the militias, everyone had gone crazy, what was I gonna do? Just let them take me away?

Narrator: When we return, the horrifying response by Midlandian forces to the militia attacks and the beginnings of Stoatopia.

/Interview with Spools sitting in the presidential palace.
Image
Spools: It was hard in the early days, Idiotus was on the rise and the war had just ended. We moderators were desperate to remain neutral until we'd stabilised the situation, but sadly it was never to be.


This has been a presentation of The Actor Revisionist Syndicate Enterprise.
ARSE: For all your history.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 12:52 am 
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i like you again. have a catboy.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 5:17 am 
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Wunderbar!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 11:35 am 
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It was a tragedy, but, you know -- ferrets ....


(That was hilarious.)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 12:06 pm 
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Location: You can't take the sky from me. Since I found Serenity.
<table align="center" style="
background: AntiqueWhite; border: 1px solid #aaa; padding: .2em; margin-bottom: 3px; width: auto;">
<tr>
<td rowspan="2" style="padding-right: 4px; padding-left: 4px;"><a href="/wiki/Image:Stop_hand.png" class="image" title="
"><img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/19/40px-Stop_hand.png" alt="" longdesc="
/wiki/Image:Stop_hand.png" /></a></td>
<td><b>The <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Accuracy" title="Wikipedia:Accuracy">accuracy</a> of this article
is disputed.</b></td>
</tr>
</table>

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 12:26 pm 
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Yeah... there was the whole evil overlord thing.

-Kitty

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 2:01 pm 
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The people desire more. Especially coverage on the overlords. And the secondary wars.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 6:07 pm 
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They will come like cheap porn stars, but only after my exam this afternoon.

Actor.

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"Why can't we go back to living like cavemen? I know it was a rough and ready existence - the men where always rough and the women were always ready! " - Santa.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 9:36 pm 
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The current administration would like alert the public to the fact that Actor is an employee of the same multi-national entertainment corperation that employs Evil-Actor, and can be trusted just as far as anyone can trust soulless propagandizers who have taken bribes from squirrels.


----

And new! Just when you thought Spools was entirely flaky, Stoat pictures, soon to a picture thread near you.


Stoat pictures brought to you by Sharpie and Staedler.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 6:34 am 
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/Cue pictures of Stoatopia during the construction, soft old trumpet melodies playing in the background.

/Show Title:
<b>The cultural undercurrents inherent in the creation of the Stoat forum. Part 2.</b>

/Cue pictures of Riots and cities burning.


Image
Evil-Actor(Voice over): Thems times were hard on all of us. Even the rioters I was leading back then. We were starving, no one would bring food into the forums. I ate another mans shoe and then some ladies high-heels. The heels tasted quite nice actually. Then the invasion came.


/Cue interview with Imp-Chan. She is sitting on a chair in a small cottage in what appears to be a woodland area.


Image
Imp-Chan: When we heard about the Pro-Centrists massing together to protect their supporters in the forums the majority of moderators had little idea what was about to follow. Mostly I think we thought it would all blow over before it got too big. I sometimes think, maybe, just maybe we could have done something to help them. But it was too late.

/Cue grainy black and white footage of soldiers dressed like elves with machine guns firing into a rioting crowd.

Narrator: On March 3rd, 2005. The Tamayo lead army was ordered to fire on the rioters. Amongst those rioters was a young poster known then as Wandering Idiot, later to be called simply Idiotus.

/Cue unbiased Radio reporter footage, in the ruins of a city.


Image
Radio: Behind me is a pile of corpses and a strange bearded man with a knife, fork and bottle of sauce. This may be the end of this battle, but it is not the end of this war for centrality.
/Screams heard behind him.
Radio: It appears that there is a survivor amongst the corpses! Young man, how did you survive?

Image
Wandering Idiot: I hid in a Pocket Dimension.
Radio: Is that possible?
Wandering Idiot: No and yes.

/Screen turns blue as he begins to explain.

Narrator: Little is known about how this so-called Pocket Dimension was created, but even less is known about the mysterious man called Idiotus. He would in time return to these streets to reclaim them as his own, but little is know about what happened between this interview and his eventual rise to power.


/Cue map of Forums. With arrows.
Narrator: During this time Midlands forces had moved far into the central territory. Sacking and looting as they progressed. Their leader RMG rallied his people to the cause with stiring speachs and public rallies.

Image
RMG(Voice only at rally): Brothers, our forces are right now breathing down the neck of victory. There is nothing to stand in our way! We sought peace but all around us have sought war. So we bring this battle to them!
Lesbians! Arm yourselves for the midlands!


Narrator: When we return, the stunning conclusion to the war, the yaoi camp controversy(The Lolicaust) and the dawn of Stoatopia.

This has been a presentation of The Actor Revisionist Syndicate Enterprise.
ARSE: For all your history.

/So sleepy.

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"Why can't we go back to living like cavemen? I know it was a rough and ready existence - the men where always rough and the women were always ready! " - Santa.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 7:40 pm 
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one catboy coming right up.
why do i get the feeling that in a month from now actor will be able to open his own catboy pimping agency?


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 9:06 pm 
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That was awesome!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 9:50 pm 
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I still don't get it.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 9:52 pm 
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It will make sense once complete. And if not, we'll make a special edition, including omitted history and revised scenes.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jun 25, 2005 9:20 am 
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;.; I have no place in history.

-Kitty

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jun 25, 2005 9:39 am 
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dont be silly kitty. theres more to come.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jul 02, 2005 11:19 am 
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H-Kat wrote:
;.; I have no place in history.

-Kitty

Nonsense, you were once right-hand man to the great Idiotus III. As well as betraying him, thus being critical to his demise and the destruction of the Death-Stoat™...

Turnstoat Bastard.

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- Robert Anton Wilson


Last edited by Wandering Idiot on Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 12:31 am 
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The many emperors period should prove amusing . . . but how can the report stand neutral on the attempted silencing of the press, produced as it is by an offshoot of the Fourth Estate?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 7:15 am 
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The Grand Army of the Stoatomac is pleased.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 9:33 am 
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I should so write a fic for this...then again, if Caffy (edit: or anyone besides me) did it then it might actually get finished before I die. :p

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