ZOMBIE FORUMS

It's a stinking, shambling corpse grotesquely parodying life.
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Thoughts thus far?
Killer. 7%  7%  [ 1 ]
Nice. 21%  21%  [ 3 ]
Meh. 36%  36%  [ 5 ]
Needs work. 14%  14%  [ 2 ]
Needs ALOT of work. 21%  21%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 14
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 Post subject: My own lousy webcomic- Oppionions appreciated.
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 12:51 pm 
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Big fan of S*P which led me here. Thought I would do a bit of self promotion.
I noticed that the shameless self promotion forum... isn't, and couldent find one that was, so I'll post here and trust a mod to move the thread if neccesary. The comic is just getting under way. Only 21 pages finished thus far. I'm gonna wait a few months and get the story fully established before I do any kind of advertising or banner exchanges and such, but I thought I'd try to get some feedback on the story thus far so I can work with it before hand. It's a serious comic, aimed at... geeks, and geeky people. Critz mutch appreciated. And if by some whimsy of fate Randy Milhholand were to pop in here and see it I could die happy.

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Thanks guys.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 1:22 pm 
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Greetings, Fuzzy.

Ah, there may not be a self-promotion forum, but there is a self-introduction thread at the top of this forum. ;-) Before the other, more virulent types get to it, please let me request that you read the first page of that thread and then perhaps make your own posting in it.

As for your comic: you have spent a fair amount of time and cleverness thinking up an interesting background for your world. The conceit of technology as darkness versus magic as light is hardly unusual, but placing the action on a tide-locked world at the terminator of night and day is well-thought-out.

I had trouble following the story, however, mostly because the characters' faces were usually concealed, so the figures on the pages were indistinguishable to me. Also, though being thrown right into the action is a tradition as old as Homer, it's hard to pull off right when your audience doesn't already know the story. Yes, the explosions and firefights are exciting, but one doesn't know what they signify so one is less inclined to care what is happening.

If I may add a very small quibble: to fail to win is to lose. To loose means to set free.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 1:27 pm 
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Tamayo wrote:
If I may add a very small quibble: to fail to win is to lose. To loose means to set free.


Ah! Thanks. Spell check is imperfect. Where was that at? [edit] Found it. Thanks.

I'll check out the intro thread now.

As I'm using photos for my characters I can't give everyone a face, so I'm covering the faces of nonspecific characters. I've been considering adding a bit more back story before entering the battle. I'll consider harder... I've also been told that the geography of the battlefield is difficult to pin down, maybe I can establish that at the same time.

[edit]
After some though- I think I'll create a factions page that will go between what are now pages one and two. It will describe the two nightside factions in greater detail with visual referances for each, and then in a third pannel I'll show the overall battlefield with a brief description. I can do this intro bit for each battle. Hmmmmm...


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 3:03 pm 
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Yep. Pretty shiny, and I like the watercolor effect on the photos. See what you can do about some personalized armor or something to tell them apart.

Perhaps a nice character bulding expository flashback would be appropriate very very soon. Jumping in the middle of a fight with I know nothing about for twenty entire pages is just blinding. Allow for some slow parts, keep the pace changing. Too constant a rythym gets monotonous.

Sooo shiny...

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 3:08 pm 
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Spools wrote:
Yep. Pretty shiny, and I like the watercolor effect on the photos. See what you can do about some personalized armor or something to tell them apart.

Perhaps a nice character bulding expository flashback would be appropriate very very soon. Jumping in the middle of a fight with I know nothing about for twenty entire pages is just blinding. Allow for some slow parts, keep the pace changing. Too constant a rythym gets monotonous.

Sooo shiny...


Actually the very next page is a flashback page... but I had orginally intended to reserved the flashbacks and extended sequences for the hardcopy version as a reason to buy it. Like watching the standard version of a movie for free, but paying for the director's cut. But if people can't get into the story, this is perhaps a bad idea... There is a problem though- alot of the material for the falshbacks- actor photos, sets and such won't be ready for another 6 months! What to do?... what to do?...


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 3:25 pm 
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Start a spin-off crappy comic to keep people tuning in while you put some quality work into the main one.
Strings of unrelated filler, however, is tiresome.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 5:47 pm 
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It should be noted that calling your own comic lousy is not much incentive for others to look at it, especially if they are familiar with the wasteland that is Keenspace.

Like the artwork, but wasn't really paying much attention to the dialogue myself...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 7:05 pm 
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i like the art style you've developed for it, and the balls in the blender action straight off, in my opinion is good. Too often people rush to tell the story of their unique world in the first paragraph.

Telling the world's, and the character's history in dribs and drabs if far more natural feeling than 12 pages of long-winded exposition at the beginning.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 7:13 pm 
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Kestenvarn wrote:
It should be noted that calling your own comic lousy is not much incentive for others to look at it, especially if they are familiar with the wasteland that is Keenspace.


I have a bad habit of self depriciation when it comes to my artwork. If people don't expect much, they won't be too disapointed, or with any luck pleasantly surprised. Or that's the idea anyway. I also am completely incapable of objectivity when it comes to my own artwork. I heavily rely on the opinions of others to figure out what can be improved, mostly friends and coworkers, but forums are nice as people have a tendancy to be brutally honest rather than simply humoring you.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 8:05 pm 
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I can't wait until this shows up on SA.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 8:16 pm 
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Radio wrote:
I can't wait until this shows up on SA.


I can.... >trepidatious< brutal honesty is one thing. SA falls into a completly different category... on the other hand, all I need to do is somehow subtly incorporate goatse into a strip and I will have thier instant approval. :p


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 8:35 pm 
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I could totally mail it in, but why. It's not that bad (compared to SA awful links of the day). It just strikes me as totally, completely, utterly nonsensical (at least at this point).

Then again, once fursuits show up, it's on.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 11:34 pm 
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Fuzzy Modem wrote:
I have a bad habit of self depriciation when it comes to my artwork. If people don't expect much, they won't be too disapointed, or with any luck pleasantly surprised.

Me, too, but: Not saying anything is preferable. Doesn't give them any expectations one way or another, and you never look like (a) a pompous ass, or (b) a pathetic nit in need of validation. All you need is "Hey pal, look at my comic and give me some feedback, if you please." They'll either be pleasantly surprised, or merely unimpressed, but never ever disappointed.
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forums are nice as people have a tendancy to be brutally honest rather than simply humoring you.

It certainly might be so for other people. I just keep hearing "Oh that's nice, Spools, good to see you're keeping yourself busy!". Hmmn.

Also, it's "opinions", though some oppionion rings sound delicious right now.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Mar 03, 2006 5:39 am 
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Yeah, I'm having difficulty telling the characters/factions apart as well. Other than that, it's a decent comic.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Mar 03, 2006 7:42 pm 
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Spools wrote:
Also, it's "opinions", though some oppionion rings sound delicious right now.


Yeah, I really can't spell for s**t...


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 12:56 am 
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Fuzzy Modem wrote:
Spools wrote:
Also, it's "opinions", though some oppionion rings sound delicious right now.


Yeah, I really can't spell for s**t...

How true. I mean, how many words have asterisks in the middle, really?

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 2:15 am 
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Its hard to distinguish the foreground from the background. Thats my main problem. Not too bad a use of 3d crap though. Not too many people can pull that sort of thing off at all, much less well.

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 8:35 am 
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<span style="font-size : 180px;">OPINION</span>

...

Sorry.

-Kitty

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 9:27 am 
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Tomkat wrote:
<span style="font-size : 180px;">OPINION</span>

...

Sorry.

What an innovative new way to break the forums. At least it's not particularly irritating. Except when it came trying to get to the quote button.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 12:23 pm 
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Right right. One 'p' in opionion. Got it. Did I mention I can't spell?

So do you guys think that an intro page for each battle with a description and pictures of the factions and a top down view of the battlefield with locations pointed out would do the trick?


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